Hope ya know, We had a Hard Time

*I wrote this over a month ago, but just having it post now...whoops :)

I've been thinking about the baby we lost a lot lately... I've been missing that baby so badly. Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones or just a mama's love, but I've been having a hard time. I'm so extremely grateful for the chance to have another baby, but it's been so hard. I keep having dreams that I miscarry again, and it's been hard to get excited, and comfortable about the new baby, because I don't want to set myself up for another devastating loss...I feel so guilty because I was over the moon about the baby that we lost, and I'm just so cautious and paranoid about this one. BUT I've been feeling the baby move more, and I'm loving it!! :) Alax even got to feel a little kick too :) I figure that I should just be happy and stop worrying so much, and just enjoy every moment. It's hard, but I'm working on it :) We find out what we're having in a couple weeks, and I can't WAIT!!! At first I thought it might be a boy, but now I'm kinda feeling like it's a girl. We'll see!

I was looking at random videos on YouTube and saw this video on the sidebar. I've watched it many times, but it really hit me today. I sobbed as I watched it, and wondered to myself how often I've cried to my Father in Heaven lately, "Hope ya know, I'm having a hard time". I hope that we can all be kinder to each other. Give a smile to someone we walk by in the store, hold a door open for someone, or volunteer our time and talents to helping others around us, because I can guarantee everyone we meet is having a hard time with something. Call it a late new years resolution, but I hope to serve others more this year. 

I'm so thankful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ. What a wonderful gift. I'm grateful that when we reach out to the heavens and say "Hope ya know, I'm having a hard time" He does know. What a blessing. Enjoy this video, and watch it often. 

Moving On...

It's true, we're moving :( Great Falls, Montana to be exact. Alax got a job offer out there and he'll be finishing up school while we're there. I never thought I'd say it, but I'm going to miss Utah so bad. I wasn't even this sad to leave California. We've made so many great friends while we were here, and It's going to stink not to be near my sister and her family anymore. I'm sad for Marlee, she's going to miss all her little friends so much. We drove up to Montana this last weekend to check it out, and see where we could live, and everything kind of fell into place right before we left. We literally found somewhere to live on the way out of town. It was a whirlwind, but I think it'll be really good for our little family. We are loading up the moving van on the 11th :( I wish we had a little longer here, but we know this is what we should be doing.  So if you're ever up in Montana, come and see us!!! :)

Baby Boy and Sick Girl

I am 20 weeks today and we had our big ultrasound this morning. We are having a BOY!! WHAT???? I thought for sure it was another girl. I am still in shock! I've already done a little shopping too :) I am so excited to have a little boy to add to our family!! Alax and I have NO idea what to name him though...Why are boy names so hard?? Any ideas?? Just look at this sweet baby!! :)

This last week we have been busy with a sick girl :( This is her on the way to the doctors...

Saddest sick face ever. Turns out she had a bad cold and an ear infection in both ears. So sad. She is feeling SO much better now, so we're all happy. Marlee can't wait to meet her baby brother, and always asks if he can come out yet. She's going to be such a great big sister!!!

Baby Grundy

Today I am officially in my second trimester!! Here I am at 14 weeks!

This morning I didn't feel as big as I normally do, so this picture may not really look like me right now, but I had to document this day :) I can't wait to start to feel the baby move, and find out if it's a girl or boy!!

On another note, tomorrow is mine and Alax's 4th anniversary! We celebrated today by going out to sushi (all cooked fish for me) and then we got a couple's massage. It was so nice to spend some time with just the two of us, and we realized we have to do it as much as possible before this little one comes. Such a good day :)

Color Run

We went to Virginia to visit my parents in September, and we had so much fun!!! My mom and I ran the Color Run, which was awesome!! It's the only way to run ;) It was so fun!! Here's a video if you haven't heard of it.

A lot of people dressed up crazy, and had cool knee socks, so my mom got us some fun ones too!!

Before the race, with our tattoos :)

so fun!!

Signing the wall

At one point, I felt like I wasn't getting enough color, so I did a chalk angel :)

SOOOOO dirty afterwards!!

We went out to eat right after the race, and we got a LOT of stares, and people whispering..It was super uncomfortable and awkward...
My mom was also super nice, and walked with me when I got tired during the race. She would have beat my butt if we were seriously running it. She's awesome. Hopefully I'll take some time today and put up more pictures of our visit.

:)

We are SO excited!!!!!!!

LOOK!!!! Makes me smile and tear up every time I look at this sweet baby :) We are soooo blessed!!! 4th of July baby :) which makes me about 9 1/2 weeks. I hope this baby is here to stay!! We are so in love already :)

Snow

It's been pretty slow around here lately, and even though I told myself I would start blogging more, there really wasn't much to talk about, so I'll just start today.
It snowed a lot last night, so Marlee and I had fun playing in it today. (Alax had to work today) It was so fun, and even though I knew Marlee was freezing, I had to force her to come inside with a bribery of hot chocolate.

 There were friends outside when we got out there!!!

Marlee liked eating the snow more than she liked playing in it.. 

Still eating....

Trying to catch snowflakes 

I taught her how to make snow angels 

LOVE this girl to death!!!

I had to throw this one in here, because this is such a classic "Marlee" Face. It cracks me up.

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm SOOOO ready for Christmas!!!! :) All this snow has got me in the mood. :)